About Me, Health, Reflections, Self Care

Spoons

Spoons are used metaphorically a lot in my life.

Tonight I have no more and do not wish to lick any…

Sometimes I do not have the spoons to deal with others and the emotional labour required to keep them afloat.

Yet I feel guilt because of it, even when it’s not my fault.

Emotional labour is a difficult and when you hit your breaking point sometimes the emotional labour is just not worth it. Is it worth it to expend your energy propping up another person with no benefit? Will it pay off in the long run? How long do you participate and support someone with emotional labour before pulling the cord? Do you wait until you realize… you were actually licking the spoon?

So many questions fill my head this evening because I am done. I am enough. I am me. I do not need to do the emotional labour in personal relationships to be worthy of them.

Social justice can take alot of emotional labour. To weather the storm you are going to need an inner circle in which there is an exchange of emotional labour and not just a drain.

Remember to take care of yourself and DO NOT do emotional labour for others who do not deserve it.

  • Read a book
  • Get a massage
  • Paint your nails
  • Take a bath
  • Go for a walk
  • Meditate

You are important! You are valuable! You are special! Just you is worthy, without any added extras!

Always remember, “‘No’ is a complete sentence.” ―  Anne Lamott

 

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About Me, Black Women, Politics, Reflections, Self Care

Triggers

Triggers

I never knew how an incident could trigger me so strongly or I never acknowledged it.

This past Saturday I participated in a #metoo rally in #yeg , as a member of Black Women United Yeg. Black women attended to support those who were currently hurting due to long standing issues within our community.

After the rally The March On Collective Edmonton accused us of trying to change the focus of the rally of; when we were trying to represent black women who have been sexually harassed and assaulted in our community.

What I learned from this experience is

Being accused of an ulterior motive when you do not have one is triggering

When the accusation of not be honest is presented, I am triggered.

I am triggered when survivors are not believed, this come from my own trauma and not being believed.

Harassment and assault regardless of whether it is sexual or not, is not okay.

We need to believe survivors. We need to stand up and support organizations fighting to support survivors or speaking on their behalf because the survivors are not always  strong enough to stand alone. We need to believe survivors because not believing survivors does harm.

We are harming and triggering victims causing them to relive their trauma when we do not believe them.

I wasn’t believed. I do not want that for anyone else.

#Ibelieveyou

“If you are silent about your pain, they’ll kill you and say you enjoyed it.” – Zora Neale Hurston

About Me, Exercise, Self Care

fitbit blaze

I bought a fitbit blaze in purple. So far I am enjoying it and it is providing me with alot of motivation!

The fitbit blaze has the appearance of a watch. It automatically tracks my exercise, steps, heart rate, floors climbed, calories burned and more.

One downfall I have found and I am not sure if this because I am in Canada but the food input barcode scanner doesn’t recognize quite a few foods. I think I will need to sync with My fitness pal as its food database is much more extensive.

I also wish it was smaller. If fitbit sold a skinnier version, I would much prefer that.

The fitbit app is great it gives me all my fitness information directly on my phone. It syncs easily and I haven’t had any connectivity issues.

I haven’t delved into the fitbit community much but do have some friends whom also have fitbits and enjoy being able to see what they are doing and participate in challenges with them.

I am also using my fitbit blaze in conjuction with the aria scale. The scale measures weight and bodyfat.

So I case you were wondering, I am keeping it!

Once I have worn it for awhile longer I’ll provide another update regarding any pros or cons I’ve found that are not mentioned above.

About Me, Baby, Beauty Care, Natural Products, Organic, Self Care

The Honest Company Samples

I received my sample packs from The Honest Company. (excuse the horrible pictures)

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The first one I tried out was the diapers and wipes. The diapers have cute patterns on them and work great. I love the wipes. I would considering using their diapers and wipes….. except for shipping costs (explanation below)

In the essentials bundle sample pack, I received laundry soap, hand soap, face & body lotion, shampoo & body wash, and healing balm. I haven’t had a chance to use any of them except the face & body lotion (see review below). As I use them I shall post my thoughts on them.

I didn’t have anyone to give the baby & toddler multi-powder as it is for babies 6 months+ and I now have a 1 month old and I also don’t have anyone to give the kids multi-vitamin to either as it is for kids 2 and older. So I can’t review these two products but can say that they sent me 1 dose of each of these products so it would be hard to test and review anyways. I guess you could see if your child liked the taste based on one portion. I’ll see if I can get the vitamins reviewed by a friend with a child and let you know what they think!

After receiving the sample packs, I ordered an essentials bundle, as I wanted to try out additional products, more baby wipes and had received a discount email. In it I received the hand soap, laundry soap, hand sanitizer, face & body lotion, and baby wipes.

I have so far used the hand sanitizer and the face & body lotion. I do not like these products, it is my personal opinion, others may diagree. I find the hand sanitizer does not evaporate. It is thick and sticky and leaves a film on my hands. The hand & body lotion is slimy and doesn’t hydrate my hands well enough. I don’t mind it as a body lotion so will continue to use it for that, but I will not order this product again as I have many other hand & body lotions that I like quite a bit more.

The one thing I found out after was that there is a catch! I live in Canada so am charged an international surcharge of 25% making it quite a bit more to ship these products to Canada. I have received an email offer from the Honest Company giving me 40% or 50% if I ordered a bundle so it was more affordable but without the discount I would not order as you can find plenty or natural products in Canada for much less.

That’s my review of The Honest Company for now, stay tuned for the further product reviews of additional items!

About Me, Reflections, Self Care

A summer’s day

It’s been hot but is finally cool again. +30s are just too warm, when you actually have to be productive and work. I have found myself in a state of restlessness over the last few weeks. So many changes coming at me at once. I wish I had a wand I could wave to make it all finished. A state of finished is what I am craving. The constant motion of life right now could use a bit of calm and routine.

A glass of chilled white wine on the deck would be just peachy tonight but alas it’s not in the cards at this time.

About Me, Autumn, Health, Self Care, Thanksgiving

Painting Pottery

Yesterday, I went to Crankpots with my bestie (emerald_giraffe)!

Here’s what I made, a pumpkin jar! In the background is my bestie’s sea mug! The pumpkin will fit in just perfectly with my favorite holiday – Thanksgiving!

My Pumpkin!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I found the painting oddly therapeutic! I think it has something to do with doing stuff with your hands. Maybe I should do this more often.

About Me, Health, Reflections, Self Care, Veg*ns of Alberta, Wedding

It’s November……

So after an extremely high stress month of October and a miserably failed “every day” blog post month.  I am still blogging away but there is far too much going on.

I missed all of Veg*ns of Alberta‘s events for World Vegetarian month.  But have promised myself there is always next year and next year I will rock world vegetarian month.  I have gone dress shopping and can’t decide on a dress.  I feel torn between two dresses I want and keep wondering why are they so expensive and should I spend this much on a dress/why am I not an amazing seamstress.  I have continued to be a Sparks leader even though it was alot more work than I had thought it would be when I first signed up, but I am loving it!!!!

K has an amazing report card.  She blew her classes out of the water!  I am so proud of her!

I am off to the lower mainland on Tuesday to visit family and scout out ceremony/reception locations and to look at renting a dress (which seems like an amazing option right now).

Through out everything this month my friends have been amazing and have been there for me through it all what I would do without them is unknown cause I’d probably just completely fall apart!!

Even with everything going on I am extremely happy and have a positive outlook and I know it will all fall into place and I will find my rhythm again it might just take a little longer than I thought.